Blog 8: Death

Jon Abe

My Bleak, Pessimistic View on Death: Physician Assisted Suicide

    They say that in life there are only two things that are imminent: death and taxes.  Although I would like to think that I am a long way from dying, as I am only nineteen years old, the fact of the matter is that I do not know when my time will come.  I would be lying if I told you that I do not think about death every once in a while.  In fact, I probably think about death too much.  Every time I put on a lime-green St. Francis Volunteer shirt and sit at a bedside at the Nuuanu Hospice center, the thought of death flashes through my mind. I cannot help but envision myself 60, 70 years down the road on that bed helpless and slowly withering away.  After a year of volunteering at Hospice, there is no doubt in my mind that I would sign the dotted line on the form that reads “Do not resuscitate.”  In fact, I would go so far as to sign the Physician Assisted Suicide (PAS) form, although it is not an option in the state of Hawaii.  If in the future I had Alzheimer's, ALS, stage 4 cancer (if a cure for cancer is not found by then) or any disease that would lead to my death in the foreseeable future, I would ask to be put down.  Though my opinion may be considered to be radical and unorthodox, I 100% stand by it, for now at least.  Perhaps when or if I have children of my own, my view will change.  To me, it makes no sense to suffer unnecessarily.  I have seen many instances where the family tries to do anything possible just to prolong their family member’s life for a little while longer.  Although they have all the right intentions, in most cases they cause more harm to the member than they would have experienced had they died.  If in the future I have ALS, it would be torturous to lose slowly by slowly lose control and function of my body until I suffocate to death because I no longer have the capacity to move my diaphragm and breathe.  Why not forgo or minimize the pain by partaking in PAS?  If indeed PAS is legal in Hawaii, then there would be no need for an agent to sign of on my medical forms.  However in the case that PAS is not legal in Hawaii, I would let my wife or children be the agent, but I would tell them in advance what my wishes are and hope that they honor my wishes.
    As for donating my organs, I have already indicated on my driver’s license that in lieu of my death, I will donate my organs.  However, I am not so sure whether or not I would be willing to donate my body to a medical school or for research.  I will leave that decision up to my wife and children.  If they are satisfied with my body being used for research purposes, then so be it.  However, if they want to cremate my body and place it in a grave for closure, then I am fine with that as well.